Why did I go into Aesthetics?

Hi guys, how are you?

I’ve been asked by one of my mentors to create a blog about why I do what I do. Why did I start an aesthetics business? It’s a bit personal and hopefully it won’t be too long. It’s probably the same reason for why I wanted to be a nurse and why I’ve always kind of fallen into being in caring roles.

A little bit of career history first. When I was completing was my A-levels, I went and worked in a home for the elderly from the age of 17. Then I went to work in a bar. I walked out on that job because the manager accused me of thieving spirits, which I didn’t (not my style to thieve). Incidentally, he was convicted a couple of years later for thieving thousands of pounds worth of goods and cash from the bar… so yeah!

Without a job, I ended up falling into being a healthcare assistant in a radiotherapy department. My housemates were both therapeutic radiographers and were sick of me not paying the rent, so they said “Right, you’re coming to work with us”. I ended up doing that job for years and years and have such fond memories and lifelong friendships because of it.

Whilst I was working in the hospital I went and did a degree in Sociology, Culture, Media thinking I would go into some kind of media. And, then I worked for a magazine for about six months and I hated it! I realised that what everyone had been saying to me since I was at primary school, that I should train to be a nurse, was correct. I just took me a long time of fighting it to realise.

I then completed my nurse training at Masters level, graduated top of my class and my career has be growing and evolving quite quickly ever since.

‘m nervous about telling you my story, prior to this. I think the reason I have become a ‘carer’ and the reason everyone thought I should be a nurse is down to my life history. I grew up with my dad. He was an alcoholic. I had to care for him most of the time. I was looking after the house, cooking meals and caring for my dad years before I was 10. We didn’t really have much food because he used to spend a lot of the money on alcohol. I was one of those kids who was manky, had bad hair with matted knots and smelled bad. When I outgrew my clothes or my shoes got busted I would have to wait until the next school holidays to see my mum before I got any new ones.

I was very very lonely and spent a lot of time living in my imagination. I even broke bones whist my dad was passed out drunk for a couple of days. I once broke my wrist and he didn’t believe me. He made me do the house work and peel potatoes for 3 days until a lady from his church told him to take me to the hospital. The doctors were understandably concerned, but I lied for my dad because I loved him and felt I needed to take care of him.

I always had this sense that I was an outsider. I was bullied at school and other Children weren’t really allowed to come and play at my house because parents were scared of my dad and rightly so. He was an alcoholic, violent and destructive.

Lack of food at home meant that when I got access to food, I used to gorge, which has given me a lifelong problem with weight and binge-eating. And as most of us know, if you are heavy a lot of people feel they have the right to belittle, humiliate give their opinions on what is wrong with you. And this always makes your problems much better…not.

Throughout my whole twenties, I was really suffering. I used to go out drinking a lot. I was miserable and angry. It took me until my 30s to get over that and sort my crap out. I realised that everybody’s in pain. Everybody has issues. I‘m not the only one who has problems. There are very few people who have had a good normal family and a good normal upbringing with no problems that they carry into adulthood.

We just have to deal with ourselves. I have done a lot of work on myself, lots of reflection and some therapy. I’m not one of those touchy feely people that likes to talk about, “my feelings” all the time, but I do reflect on myself. I just don’t necessarily share it.

I’ve got to the point in my life now (I’m nearly 42) where I’m kind of okay with myself. I’m okay being a bit shit. I’m okay that I’m fat and probably will never be thin. I know that when I get stressed or anxious or tired, I put on weight. I know when I’m happy, I lose weight. So I just accept those parts about myself that aren’t perfect. There are lots of things I’m not really that good at. I’m pretty mediocre at most things I try. The only thing I’ve ever done that I’m really good at, is being a nurse. And I guess that’s why I’m still doing it. I’m a bit of a geek. I love to learn about different kinds of diseases, treatments, anatomy and physiology. If there’s something that I don’t know, I need to go read up.

I think what has pushed me towards aesthetics is, whilst I love looking after people in my everyday job as an advanced nurse practitioner, there are a lot of people who don’t have very much confidence. They’ve had hard times in their life. They don’t feel great about themselves. And, the thing that I love in doing aesthetics is making people feel happy and better about themselves.

So when you leave my clinic radiating confidence and ready to shine, that gives me the greatest satisfaction and it validates me professionally and personally to know that Ihave helped someone x.